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Ogden Nash
I think that...
I think that I shall never see
A billboard lovely as a tree.
Perhaps unless the billboards fall,
I'll never...
God in His...
God in His wisdom made the fly
And then forgot to tell us why.
Source: In...
Children aren't happy...
Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore,
And that's what parents were created for.
I would live...
I would live all my life in nonchalance and insouciance/Were it not for making a living, which is rather a...
Professional men, they...
Professional men, they have no cares;
whatever happens, they get theirs.
Source:...
Middle age is...
Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone...
Marriage is an...
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the...
In the world...
In the world of mules there are no rules.
Source: In Webster's Electronic...
Life is not...
Life is not having been told
That the man just waxed the floor.
Source: In...
Middle age is...
Middle age is when you're sitting at home on Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for...
If called by...
If called by a panther,
don't anther.
Source: In 1,911 Best Things Anybody Ever...
There is only...
There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball,
And that is to have either a clear conscience...
An occasional lucky...
An occasional lucky guess as to what makes a wife tick is the best a man can hope for,
Even then, no sooner has he...
How easy for...
How easy for those who do not bulge
To not overindulge!
Source: A Necessary...
Purity is obscurity....
Purity is obscurity.
Source: In Webster's Electronic Quotebase, ed. Keith Mohler,...
Oh, what a...
Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave
When they think that their children are naive.
Some tortures are...
Some tortures are physical and some are mental, but the one that's both is dental.
The cow is...
The cow is of the bovine ilk;
One end is moo, the other, milk.
Source: The...
The only people...
The only people who should really sin
Are the people who can sin with a grin.
Senescence begins<br>And middle...
Senescence begins
And middle age ends,
The day your descendants,
Outnumber your...