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Ambrose Bierce
GENEALOGY, n. An...
GENEALOGY, n. An account of one's descent from an ancestor who did not particularly care to trace his...
FRIENDLESS, adj. Having...
FRIENDLESS, adj. Having no favors to bestow. Destitute of fortune. Addicted to utterance of truth and common...
FORK, n. An...
FORK, n. An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the...
FINANCE, n. The...
FINANCE, n. The art or science of managing revenues and resources for the best advantage of the manager. The...
EXHORT, v.t. In...
EXHORT, v.t. In religious affairs, to put the conscience of another upon the spit and roast it to a nut-brown...
GENEROUS, adj. Originally...
GENEROUS, adj. Originally this word meant noble by birth and was rightly applied to a great multitude of persons. It...
FUTURE, n. That...
FUTURE, n. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true, and our happiness is...
GAMBLING,n. [As in]...
GAMBLING,n. [As in] 'The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as...
FLOP, v. Suddenly...
FLOP, v. Suddenly to change one's opinions and go over to another party. The most notable flop on record was that of...
EXPOSTULATION, n. One...
EXPOSTULATION, n. One of the many methods by which fools prefer to lose their friends.
GEOGRAPHER, n. A...
GEOGRAPHER, n. A chap who can tell you offhand the difference between the outside of the world and the...
GHOST, n. The...
GHOST, n. The outward and visible sign of an inward fear.
Source: The Devil's...
GNU, n. An...
GNU, n. An animal of South Africa, which in its domesticated state resembles a horse, a buffalo and a stag. In its...
FREEBOOTER, n. A...
FREEBOOTER, n. A conqueror in a small way of business, whose annexations lack of the sanctifying merit of...
FAMOUS, adj. Conspicuously...
FAMOUS, adj. Conspicuously miserable.
Source: The Devil's Dictionary, 1911.
--...
HAND, n. A...
HAND, n. A singular instrument worn at the end of the human arm and commonly thrust into somebody's...
GNOSTICS, n. A...
GNOSTICS, n. A sect of philosophers who tried to engineer a fusion between the early Christians and the Platonists....
GOOSE, n. A...
GOOSE, n. A bird that supplies quills for writing. These [quills] when inked and drawn mechanically across paper by a...
GLUTTON, n. A...
GLUTTON, n. A person who escapes the evils of moderation by committing dyspepsia.
FORMA PAUPERIS. [Latin]...
FORMA PAUPERIS. [Latin] In the character of a poor person -- a method by which a litigant without money for lawyers is...