When you put down the good things you ought to have done, and leave out the bad ones you did do -- well, that's Memoirs.
Source: The Autobiography of Will Rogers, ch. 16, 1949.
-- Will Rogers, (Nov 4 1879-1935), US actor, lecturer, humorist; He is remembered as a Comedy roper in Ziegfield Follies and a witty columnist, 1926-35.