Creative Quotations from Erma Bombeck (1927-1996)

Creative Quotations from . . .

Erma Bombeck
(1927-1996) born on Feb 21

US journalist, author, humorist. She dealt humorously with her life as a suburban housewife, e.g., "The Grass is Greener Over the Septic Tank," 1976.

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Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.

It is fast approaching the point where I don't want to elect anyone stupid enough to want the job.

I worry about scientists discovering that lettuce has been fattening all along. . . .

I've been on a constant diet for the last two decades. I've lost a total of 789 pounds. BY all accounts, I should be hanging from a charm bracelet.

I do not participate in a sport with ambulances at the bottom of the hill.

Published Sources for the above Quotations:
F:	In "1,911 Best Things Anybody Ever Said," ed. Robert Byrne, 1988.
R:	From "Rand Lindsly's HUGE Quotations File," an collection of quotations from the Internet.
A:	"If Life is a Bowl of Cherries, What am I Doing in the Pits?," 1978.
N:	In "An Uncommon Scold," by Abby Adams, 1989.
K:	On skiing.