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Tom Lehrer: On my income...

Tom Lehrer: On my income...

On my income tax 1040 it says 'Check this box if you are blind.' I wanted to put a check mark about three inches...

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Janis Joplin: You got to...

Janis Joplin: You got to...

You got to get it while you can. . .

Source: Get It While You Can.
-- Janis...

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Billy Crystal: Did you ever...

Billy Crystal: Did you ever...

Did you ever reach a point in your life, where you say to yourself, 'This is the best I'm ever going to look, the best...

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W C Fields: Horse sense is...

W C Fields: Horse sense is...

Horse sense is a good judgement which keeps horses from betting on people.

Source:...

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W C Fields: You can't trust...

W C Fields: You can't trust...

You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it.

Source: In The...

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John Wayne: Talk low, talk...

John Wayne: Talk low, talk...

Talk low, talk slow, and don't say too much.

Source: In Reader's Digest, Apr...

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Charlie Chaplin: Movies are a...

Charlie Chaplin: Movies are a...

Movies are a fad. Audiences really want to see live actors on a stage.

Source: In...

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Robert Morley: Names were not...

Robert Morley: Names were not...

Names were not so much dropped as thrown in a perpetual game of catch.

Source: On...

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Gloria Swanson: I think all...

Gloria Swanson: I think all...

I think all this talk about age is foolish. Every time I'm one year older, everyone else is...

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Laurence Olivier: I take a...

Laurence Olivier: I take a...

I take a simple view of life: keep your eyes open and get on with it.

Source: In...

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Brigitte Bardot: It is sad...

Brigitte Bardot: It is sad...

It is sad to grow old but nice to ripen.

Source: In The Speaker's Electronic...

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Jane Wagner: I made some...

Jane Wagner: I made some...

I made some studies, and reality is the leading cause of stress amongst those in touch with it. I can take it in small...

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Miles Davis: That was my...

Miles Davis: That was my...

That was my gift . . . having the ability to put certain guys together that would create a chemistry and then letting...

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Jelly Roll Morton: Get up from...

Jelly Roll Morton: Get up from...

Get up from that piano. You hurtin' its feelings.

Source: In Hear Me Talkin' To Ya,...

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Ed Howe: I was sick...

Ed Howe: I was sick...

I was sick of people making fun of my hair and so I cut it off and I've got much more attention than ever before. It...

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Woody Allen: The lion and...

Woody Allen: The lion and...

The lion and the calf will lay down together, but the calf won't get much sleep.

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David Hare: The poetry from...

David Hare: The poetry from...

The poetry from the eighteenth century was prose; the prose from the seventeenth century was...

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David Hare: Weak minds sink...

David Hare: Weak minds sink...

Weak minds sink under prosperity as well as adversity; but strong and deep ones have two high...

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Joaquin Miller: That man who...

Joaquin Miller: That man who...

That man who lives for self alone,
Lives for the meanest mortal known.


Source:...

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Countee Cullen: The play is...

Countee Cullen: The play is...

The play is done, the crowds depart; and see
That twisted tortured thing hung from a tree,
Swart victim of a...

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