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PHILANTHROPIST, n. A...

PHILANTHROPIST, n. A...

PHILANTHROPIST, n. A rich (and usually bald) old gentleman who has trained himself to grin while his conscience is...

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PLATONIC, adj. Pertaining...

PLATONIC, adj. Pertaining...

PLATONIC, adj. Pertaining to the philosophy of Socrates. Platonic Love is a fool's name for the affection between a...

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PLEBEIAN, n. An...

PLEBEIAN, n. An...

PLEBEIAN, n. An ancient Roman who in the blood of his country stained nothing but his hands. Distinguished from the...

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PITIFUL, adj. The...

PITIFUL, adj. The...

PITIFUL, adj. The state of an enemy of opponent after an imaginary encounter with oneself.

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PEDESTRIAN, n. The...

PEDESTRIAN, n. The...

PEDESTRIAN, n. The variable (an audible) part of the roadway for an automobile.

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POLITICIAN, n. An...

POLITICIAN, n. An...

POLITICIAN, n. An eel in the fundamental mud upon which the superstructure of organized society is reared. When he...

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PROVIDENTIAL, adj. Unexpectedly...

PROVIDENTIAL, adj. Unexpectedly...

PROVIDENTIAL, adj. Unexpectedly and conspicuously beneficial to the person so describing...

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PIRACY, n. Commerce...

PIRACY, n. Commerce...

PIRACY, n. Commerce without its folly-swaddles, just as God made it.

Source: The...

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POLYGAMY, n. A...

POLYGAMY, n. A...

POLYGAMY, n. A house of atonement, or expiatory chapel, fitted with several stools of repentance, as distinguished...

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PLAN, n. --...

PLAN, n. --...

PLAN, n. -- The best method of accomplishing an accidental result.

Source: The...

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PRICE, n. Value,...

PRICE, n. Value,...

PRICE, n. Value, plus a reasonable sum for the wear and tear of conscience in demanding...

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PRE-EXISTENCE, n. An...

PRE-EXISTENCE, n. An...

PRE-EXISTENCE, n. An unnoted factor in creation.

Source: The Devil's Dictionary,...

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REALITY, n. The...

REALITY, n. The...

REALITY, n. The dream of a mad philosopher. That which would remain in the cupel if one should assay a phantom. The...

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REASON, n. Propensitate...

REASON, n. Propensitate...

REASON, n. Propensitate of prejudice.

Source: The Devil's Dictionary, 1911.
--...

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REASON, v.i. To...

REASON, v.i. To...

REASON, v.i. To weight probabilities in the scales of desire.

Source: The Devil's...

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PROOF-READER, n. A...

PROOF-READER, n. A...

PROOF-READER, n. A malefactor who atones for making your writing nonsense by permitting the compositor to make it...

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RACK, n. An...

RACK, n. An...

RACK, n. An argumentative implement formerly much used in persuading devotees of a false faith to embrace the living...

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PRESENT, n. That...

PRESENT, n. That...

PRESENT, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of...

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QUOTIENT, n. A...

QUOTIENT, n. A...

QUOTIENT, n. A number showing how many times a sum of money belonging to one person is contained in the pocket of...

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RESIGN, v.t. To...

RESIGN, v.t. To...

RESIGN, v.t. To renounce an honor for an advantage. To renounce an advantage for a greater...

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