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I'll say this...

I'll say this...

I'll say this for adversity: people seem to be able to stand it, and that's more than I can say for...

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We'd all like...

We'd all like...

We'd all like to vote for the best man, but he's never a candidate.

Source: In...

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The safe way...

The safe way...

The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.

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Nobody can be...

Nobody can be...

Nobody can be as agreeable as an uninvited guest.

Source:
-- Kin Hubbard, (Sep...

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The fellow that...

The fellow that...

The fellow that agrees with everything you say is either a fool or he is getting ready to skin...

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Nobody works as...

Nobody works as...

Nobody works as hard for his money as the man who marries it.

Source: In Webster's...

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You won't skid...

You won't skid...

You won't skid if you stay in a rut.

Source: In Webster's Electronic Quotebase, ed....

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ALLIANCE, n. In...

ALLIANCE, n. In...

ALLIANCE, n. In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each...

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ARREST, v.t. Formally...

ARREST, v.t. Formally...

ARREST, v.t. Formally to detain one accused of unusualness.

Source: The Devil's...

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ART, n. This...

ART, n. This...

ART, n. This word has no definition. Its origin is related by the ingenious Father Gassalasca Jape as One day a wag --...

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BENEFACTOR, n. One...

BENEFACTOR, n. One...

BENEFACTOR, n. One who makes heavy purchases of ingratitude, without, however, materially affecting the price, which...

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COENOBITE, n. A...

COENOBITE, n. A...

COENOBITE, n. A man who piously shuts himself up to meditate upon the sin of wickedness; and to keep it fresh in his...

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DECALOGUE, n. A...

DECALOGUE, n. A...

DECALOGUE, n. A series of commandments, ten in number -- just enough to permit an intelligent selection for...

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DECIDE, v.i. To...

DECIDE, v.i. To...

DECIDE, v.i. To succumb to the preponderance of one set of influences over another set.

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DEBAUCHEE, n. One...

DEBAUCHEE, n. One...

DEBAUCHEE, n. One who has so earnestly pursued pleasure that he has had the misfortune to overtake...

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DELEGATION, n. In...

DELEGATION, n. In...

DELEGATION, n. In American politics, an article of merchandise that comes in sets.

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Philosophy consists very...

Philosophy consists very...

Philosophy consists very largely of one philosopher arguing that all others are jackasses. He usually proves it, and I...

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A metaphysician is...

A metaphysician is...

A metaphysician is one who, when you remark that twice two makes four, demands to know what you mean by twice, what by...

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The urge to...

The urge to...

The urge to save humanity is almost always only a false face for the urge to rule it.

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The truly civilized...

The truly civilized...

The truly civilized man is always skeptical and tolerant. . . . His culture is based on 'I'm not too...

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