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George Burns: Retirement at sixty-five...

George Burns: Retirement at sixty-five...

Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.

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Lenny Bruce: All my humor...

Lenny Bruce: All my humor...

All my humor is based upon destruction and despair. If the whole world were tranquil, without disease and violence,...

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Fred Allen: We are living...

Fred Allen: We are living...

We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supply himself with...

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Fred Allen: He dreamed he...

Fred Allen: He dreamed he...

He dreamed he was eating shredded wheat and woke up to find the mattress half gone.

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Minnie Pearl: Take the back...

Minnie Pearl: Take the back...

Take the back roads instead of the highways.

Source: In The Book of Country Music...

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Jackie Moms Mabley: Love is like...

Jackie Moms Mabley: Love is like...

Love is like playing checkers. You have to know which man to move.

Source:...

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Jackie Moms Mabley: Life is like...

Jackie Moms Mabley: Life is like...

Life is like a game of poker: If you don't put any in the pot, there won't be any to take...

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Reba McEntire: Be different, stand...

Reba McEntire: Be different, stand...

Be different, stand out, and work your butt off.

Source: In The Book of Country...

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Alfred Hitchcock: Give them pleasure...

Alfred Hitchcock: Give them pleasure...

Give them pleasure the same pleasure they have when they wake up from a nightmare.

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Herbert Beerbohm Tree: Every man is...

Herbert Beerbohm Tree: Every man is...

Every man is a potential genius until he does something.

Source: In Webster's...

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Herbert Beerbohm Tree: When I pass...

Herbert Beerbohm Tree: When I pass...

When I pass my name in such large letters I blush, but at the same time instinctively raise my...

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Herbert Beerbohm Tree: Sir, I have...

Herbert Beerbohm Tree: Sir, I have...

Sir, I have tested your machine. It adds new terror to life and makes death a long-felt...

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Eleanor Robson Belmont: In retrospect, the...

Eleanor Robson Belmont: In retrospect, the...

In retrospect, the past seems not one existence with a continuous flow of years and events that follow each other in...

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Marilyn Monroe: A career is...

Marilyn Monroe: A career is...

A career is born in public -- talent in privacy.

Source: Marilyn: The Woman Who...

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Lauren Bacall: Imagination is the...

Lauren Bacall: Imagination is the...

Imagination is the highest kite that one can fly.

Source: In Lauren Bacall, By...

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Ava Gardner: Everybody kisses everybody...

Ava Gardner: Everybody kisses everybody...

Everybody kisses everybody else in this crummy business all the time. It's the kissiest business in the...

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Maria Schell: Peace is when...

Maria Schell: Peace is when...

Peace is when time doesn't matter as it passes by.

Source: In Time 3 Mar...

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Maria Schell: If there were...

Maria Schell: If there were...

If there were one city I should pick to live in, it would be New York. It is a city where I walk down the street and...

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Maggie Smith: I believe that...

Maggie Smith: I believe that...

I believe that I am past my prime. I had reckoned on my prime lasting till I was at least...

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Jacqueline Bisset: I want to...

Jacqueline Bisset: I want to...

I want to keep my attractiveness as long as I can. It has to do with vitality, and energy and interest. We all lose...

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